Brave and vulnerable in difficult times. Me portrayed by my mom, artist Anita Löhndorf
Lean in to the difficult emotion. Don’t try to suppress it, or to wave it off. Stay with it. Where do you feel it in your body? I want to run and hide. Okay. Take a deep breath. Now, what do you feel in your body? There’s a big lump in my throat. Makes me want to throw up. My chest feels so compressed, it almost hurts. In my stomach, anxiety feels free to live out, today in the form of ghosts performing some kind of fear provoking shadow dance.
I feel panicky. I want to scream. I want to run and hide. I’m struggling. So much LOVE in and around me, so much support, and yet I feel like no one understands. I feel alone. Not on an existential level. Not in my heart. How could I, with the amazing family and friends that I have?!
Yet, here and now, with problems to solve, information to seek, tasks to perform – most of them of the anxiety evoking sort, I feel pinned down and alone. I want to sob, and I do, but I’m afraid it’s scaring the people around me. Afraid, that it’s perceived of as me not being able to take care of my emotions. While for me, the opposite is true: Let me cry. Let me process my emotions in whatever way I need to, as long as I’m not harming anyone, it helps me get through them faster.
Time to take a look at my calm map (see https://eclectictree.wordpress.com/2014/07/02/seeking-peacefulness/). Time to ground myself. To breathe. To feel for my center. Find my faith. WRITE about it. Oh, I just did that. Vulnerably and authentically. Good.
There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Eclectic Tree 
Oh Simone, I love how vulnerable you are. I love how expressive your words are. You inspire me and I’m writing of my own pain. Yes there is light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve been through those tunnels many times and have come out.
Love, Jean
Vilket underbart porträtt av dig!
Ja, jag tycker att det verkligen visar mig i min känsla av sårbarhet. Och tapperhet 😉
PS. Jättebra att du skriver om ångest, det skrämmer mig inte. Det skrämmer mig om du inte skriver.
Tack Karin, dina ord betyder mycket!
Älskade Simone. Du ska veta att jag finns här för dig!
Och jag är inte rädd för tårar.
Kom på att jag ju såklart kan hjälpa dig med nåt praktiskt (samtal m myndighet/papper eller annat). Sitter på kontor stor del av dagen och kan hitta utrymme för sånt om det kan vara till nån hjälp..
Stor kram, Lovisa
Tack så mycket min kära och saknade vän, för att du inte är rädd varken för tårar eller för försäkringskassan! Det är till så stor hjälp! Kramar!
Luta dig mot mig imorgon Simone och jag mot dig.Tillsammans ska vi se ljuset i tunneln och det kommer vi göra,ibland är det så svårt…
Jag tänker på dig !
Awesome content you got here! You can earn some extra money from your website,
don’t miss this opportunity, for more details simply search in google –
omgerido monetize website
Thank you, Clint! I’m very happy you like it!
And thanks for the tip, I will check it out!